Caught a lite sneeze

"Boys like to think they're the flu, but sometimes all they are is a lite sneeze."

                                                                   Tori Amos

Creí que eras una fiebre fatal, que me consumirías por completo. En aquel entonces yo era pequeña, inocente. Me abrasabas por el cuerpo y el alma. Te creí gripe.

Pero el tiempo pasa, y el invierno es frío, no sobrevivieron los árboles, ¿cómo iba a sobrevivir tu fría llama? Y aun así seguí en cama. Como el niño que no quiere ir al colegio, me negaba a ver que ya no me quemaba. Hasta aquel día.

Pasaste de llama a lluvia, todo frío, todo hielo, granizo golpeando mi maltrecha piel. Tiritando bajo el gélido manto invernal, se me escapó un estornudo. Rápido, fugaz, intenso. Futil. Nada eres si en nada quedas, y a mi ya ni recuerdos me puedes arrancar. Nada salvo un cuerpo desnudo, y un susurro silencioso en el vacío.

Y como dijo Neruda, 'de otro. Será de otro. Como antes de mis besos.' Solo que aquellos besos que nunca me diste son aquellos que me podrían haber mantenido a tu lado.

Pero nunca fuiste más que un estornudo.

Home?

Takes too long, so long it won't let me breathe. The moment I can leave seems so far, and there's so little air in here. Got too many tears, got too many troubles. Who in the world do you think you are, making me hurt, ignoring my own blood, breaking my rules?

Who do you think you are? Something gave you the idea that your power is endless, that you can have a say in every tiny thing I do. But you don't, you obnoxious lousy human. You're nothing but the same, flesh and bones, skin loose and muscles ripping underneath with rage, just as me, just as the rest of us.

He could be dead for all I know, yet you don't care. Just a knock, and life would be easier, just a knock. Too much? Not enough. And you want me to respect you? You're nothing but scum, and you want respect?

Just die, will you?

Head over heels

In the screenlight, hands intertwined. My lips are purple and I don't know why. You make a move, I let you try. Have never felt this way, so set alight. With your sighs collapsing on my overheated skin, and hope in your darkened eyes that stare into mine, my angel, I feel like I am falling into the night, with no fears to make me hide.

It's the sound of your laughter, and your face when you're surprised. It's the way you growl at me in the dark. In all the moments we've shared I've been left wanting more, and I can't make it stop, nor do I want.

And then you're suddenly there, lights on and looking into my soul, asking me if I would be yours. A smile blooms in my face, I can't contain the bliss in me. Exploding, I say yours to take. Because I am head over heels in love (de cabeza y sin frenos, corazón).

It all started...

It all started in the swing set when we were rocking, the three of us, you, me, and the one in between. You were smiling that smirk that makes me think your mind is a scary, scary place. Then you held my hand, the world stopped spinning, and suddenly the stars were brighter. And there in the darkness, when they all went to sleep, you stole my breath away.

Awkward day with awkward glances and my sunkissed skin burning brightly. You touch me and I feel like flying. Everybody knows, and it's all kisses and kittens and rainbows in lalaland. And then you sing to me, begging please don't go, and I'm melting to the ground, done for.


But then I have to part. Have never felt such sweet sorrow. You tell me don't go, I say I'll be back.

You say you'll wait for me.

Evolution Revolution

"Your socks in the sink, your food in the fridge..."


"What's wrong with my food?"


"It's not food anymore, Dean, it's Darwinism!"

Darwinism. That's it, that's right. Food that's evolved into a new, not so appealing but much more lively...mess. With growing hair and green and white as the main colours, crowding the spaces in that long-forgotten fridge, aided by unpaid light bills.

Green and white and soft and about to explode with gas. And the brown pool splashing to the grown; sticky, brown pool of undetermined jelly. I'm arms-deep in bleach and life blurting out from each and every corner, taking over where only death was before. Evolution. Darwinism. My very own tribute to Sammy-psychopsychic and Dean-tootoughformyself.

(And to the yellow eyed bastard...just die, will you? Die, then burn yourself.)

Tell me why

When the whole world turns against me. When it's not alone, but lonely. When this room I'm in starts moving its walls towards me, closing in on me, threatening to choke me and spill my guts over the window. When there is no love without disappointment, no truth in your deceitful words.

No sympathy, no reality that I can face, just the world, bare and raw, biting cold and dangerous. Smothered by the monsters beyond, hidden in a wardrobe I don't need, I don't want, I can't share.

When all I feel is the wet embrace of realization, when the black stains on my sketchpad are not ink anymore, when a kiss is too cold, when a hug is so longed it's no longer there, when at the end of the day the phone is silent and it hasn't rained, but it's all drenched, you may ask yourself,

Where did I go wrong?

Kahlua

De color caramelo y dulce sabor, en cristal ajeno, sofa ajeno, todo ajeno, ¿algo me queda? Notas altas, bajas, viejas canciones que nunca escuché pero siempre supe, y nuevos conocidos más allá del blanco límite de mi habitacion.

De color caramelo y olor a café; crema y hielo. Consuelo de una noche, fin de un dia gris como el cielo que todo lo cubre, que todo lo ve. Ante el megáfono no hay voz que no suene, no hay estrella sin nombre.

De color caramelo, caramelo ha de ser. Un último trago y las risas resuenan en el cuarto vacio solo a trozos, amor y deseo, hambre, pasion, y tras la puerta cerrada, solo ecos. Y en un solo momento, tu voz, suave y desgarradora. Te desnudo en un segundo, y derramo Kahlua por tu cuerpo.

Qué dulce es tu piel.