lunes, 14 de julio de 2008

Northern Lad.

And as the time went by, all I could see was that maybe it was indeed time to turn the page, as in the distance I couldn't miss you. I was only wet because of the rain. How long has it been? Two, three weeks? I can't bring myself to care. Had you long enough trapped in my arms, maybe it's time to let you go. I can feel it, don't say that you don't.

Wish you could see me now. See the discomfort in my eyes when I think of next weeks. See my unability to cry about you. See the deep scars in my heart. Maybe it's all your fault, you hurt it so bad it couldn't heal, and no trust, no love.

Wish you could see me, see the real me. The loud girl who likes laughing, who is not bound to be worried about you, about how she acts around you, the one who likes keeping control over everything. You instead can only see the silent wreck you created, the excuse of a person that will remain mouth shut, despite the occasional random outburst.

And it's not as if you show up that much to say it's worth it. My bed gets so fucking cold, and I can't bear to go to my secret places. Too bad I shared them with you. Tough luck mine. Yes, you loved me, I also loved you, but I'm not the same, neither are you. You've grown away from me, and you don't have that spark in your eyes anymore. I fear what got into you.

Gosh, I'm exausted to say that love is not enough to keep something going. So my dear northern lad, stay in your northern lands.

PS. I've taken a liking to writing in english. Mother tongue I guess, too deep in my mind to erase it.

PPS. Give Tori a try. She inspired this whole load of pointless crap.

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