Rowing boat

Long like fingers, reaching through the dark, deep waters, reaching for a shade. What if I tried to reach for you too? All gone, all I care for, all I ever loved, left me alone on top of this island that some call home. It is not.

Nostalgia bites me hard, like a pulsating rain, pounding down, onto my head, clawing its way into my heart. Where did you go? I can't feel you anymore.

I can't very well row this distance that separates me from the shore. What am I to do?

I need you so much closer.

I want you so much closer.

I'd love you so much closer.

I can't have you any closer.

And I'd cross the atlantic swimming only for you, but it's a mile too long. You live far, Mars and beyond. No way to figure out where you've gone. So come on, come back to find me, because I'm at my wit's end, and I can't help missing you, but don't know what to do.

Come on.

Skinny dip

Are we looking for a happy ending? Your voice lulls me to sleep, fills me up with rejoice. Morning comes ever so often ever so soon, and it cries for you. Take my hand, one of this days, you're gonna have to take me home with you. Fall in the deep ocean together, as skinny as the day we were born. Drown together.

Do fairytales really exist?

Is there a beauty for the beast? Is there a little mermaid devoid of voice, turning to seafoam for not killing her love?

Moving pictures across the screen, faces I seem to know, people I'll never meet. Flashy lights of Hollywood? Is that all there is underneath? True love turning the corner, is it love? Really? Can it be? Love is truth. Love is being vulnerable, yet stronger than ever. Love is being there, always, even when you're not wanted, even when you know it's all unrequited, like beast was for beauty, when he knew she would never love him for what he was. Love is trying on your better self for the sake of that one person. Love is... Well, not this.

I saw his face, slashed, burned, dead. She loved anyway. I saw one cross the world to meet a first love forever kept in her heart. I've seen men and women brave methaphorical storms I have yet to see the likes of, break the deepest-rooted taboos in our society for that moment in the morning when you wake up and he's there. But I'm babbling away. What I mean is... I don't know what I mean, meaning got lost in somewhere I don't remember. What do I mean? Maybe I mean that I should have been stolen, like Ygritte and her Lord Snow. Maybe it's just that I don't feel the princess anymore, without no prince charming. Or maybe I'm meaningless.

They say beauty is skin deep, but who could love a monster? In this day and age, there would be no beauty for the beast, cause fairytales lie dead in a ditch.

Complicaciones de un lenguaje verbal

Esta noche no puedo dormir, espero al alba en mi cama, con la cabeza llena de posibles finales diferentes. Palabras, son solo palabras, pero confunden, duelen, arañan cuando lo dicho y lo oído no coinciden en perfecta calcamonía. Te echo de menos, sin embargo, y me confunden estas conversaciones. Descolocan mi visión de las cosas, a veces no se que quieres conmigo, tus palabras dicen una cosa, tus hechos otra y yo ahí en medio leyendo como si fuera disléxica. Así que no puedo dormir. Esta noche estoy sola.

Starlight

Como una quimera, los jirones deshilachados de un sueño que se esfuma con la bruma de la mañana. Como una realidad imposible, una ilusión óptica que pone a prueba tu sentido de la lógica. En aquello que nos define nos perdemos, y yo me vuelvo a perder.

Siempre hay periodos buenos. Pedazos de tiempo en los que el silencio de mi media alma me otorga paz de pensamiento, en los que puedo pensar en ti sin que se me rompa el corazón a trozos, y me envuelve la sensación de que, por fin, todo ha acabado, que he aprendido a aceptar lo que la vida me ha dado.

Pero entonces vuelve, como un león agazapado, nunca se había ido de verdad, tan solo no podía captar su olor. Y cómo vuelve. Arañando y mordiendo, arrancando trozos de carne, alcanzando el hueso y destrozando la médula. Agota mis energías, me absorve por completo hasta dejarme con el único deseo de tumbarme y evocar -invocar- tus manos.

La realidad es que nuestra realidad es una utopía, un sueño desvaneciéndose entre los primeros rayos de sol. Tu destino era salvarme para luego dejarme marchitar sola. Mi destino es soportarlo. Por ti, para ti.

Because I, you, me... am one.

The Witch and the Storm

Trying. I really am. It's not so easy, but I try to understand. So things don't always follow my blueprint, does happen from time to time. I try to deal. What's this all about but that? It's all jokes, and it's a nifty trick I learned to never mean what I say. Of deceitful nature, in name of truth. We all keep something trapped inside. You your monster, me the lies (and the truth hidden in between). For I don't hate you, it's ok, I just feel misvalued, no, what I feel is ok. There's no reason, just the moskito in my eyelid. It already flew away. They all do eventually. But blueprints were never really meant to be followed.

Sueño de una tarde de primavera.

Tú. Yo. Visión reduccionista del mundo, resumen y sumario de todo cuanto es. Yo. Tú.

Oí tu voz pronunciarte sobre la realidad, la esencia de este instante. Convencido de que cada segundo había de ser el único. Cada historia sin un principio ni final, solas, etéreas, eternas.Tu voz de terciopelo, grave, profunda, silenciosa, recordándome quien soy.

Mi oído, susurras, es una maquina perfecta de recoger sentimientos. Pedías que no dejara escapar la oportunidad, que me quedara y escuchara el resto de la función, y eso hice, eso hago. Todavía escucho en el silencio de la tarde que huele a calor, como si pudiera captar un latido. El amarillo nápoles se cuela por la ventana y habla de ajetreo y movimiento. Energía. Tú.

Acariciando mi piel con dedos de universo, me cuestionas, preguntas qué hago. ¿Es solo un sueño? Se me escapa el sol, aunque a la tarde aun le quedan horas. Miro al vacío de mi almohada.

Estás hecha para escucharme. 

No quiero oir más, así que me tapo las orejas con manos de cristal, y huyo a dormir, donde tú siempre estás corpóreo, donde muero, donde comienza el mundo. Yo. Tú. Tú y yo.